Rejuvenation :: Controlled Chaos

It’s been ten days since I got back to work, and I’m finally getting back into the swing of things.  And… I’m ready for vacation again.  It’s not that I don’t like what I’m doing right now, but it’s that the routine hasn’t changed much and I’m ready for a new one.

These last ten days have felt a bit chaotic, even if it was only a mental chaos, but now I feel like I’m back in control again.  In other words, controlled chaos – like in this video:

MP Cunningham

I feel like this video is the perfect metaphor for what most of us go through while working in a creative industry.  I often feel like I’m drowning or that I’m never going to make it, but every once in a while something happens, like when the photographer makes $25 for one photo and feels like he has finally made it.  I have that feeling every once in a while.  Now I’m waiting for that next fleeting moment when I can tell myself that I’m actually doing ok and that this decision to work in this industry is not a huge mistake.  Those little moments make it all worth it and I’m sure another one will come when I least expect it.  Those moments are rejuvenating enough to make me work for the next one.

So even if I’m not feeling completely sure of what I’m doing, it’s reassuring to know that everyone seems to go through this in life. I seem to be right on schedule.

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